Omegle: A Throwback to the 90s

Remember those halcyon days of the 90s, when the internet was in its infancy? Well, it's back. Those awesome chat rooms: AOL, ICQ, Alamak. It's conversation with a complete stranger, from the privacy of your own computer, ONLINE! Check out Omegle. Here's a transcript of one of my conversations. And it helps if you know both Chinese and French. And sorry, it's pretty damn long.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: yo
Stranger: hi
Stranger: what's up
You: so, you know the deal: a/s/l
Stranger: i don' know
You: How can you not know?
Stranger: what do you want to do
You: how bout play golf?
Stranger: i'm a new one
You: From where are you?
Stranger: it spend so much money
Stranger: chinese
Stranger: and you
You: chinese
Stranger: yes
You: yes, it is so
Stranger: did you have been here?
You: i look long at the ocean
Stranger: which province?
You: Henan
Stranger: o
You: u?
Stranger: i study in jiangsu
Stranger: i from guangxi
You: wow
Stranger: live in guangdong
You: Guangdong not Guangxi
Stranger: what's your favorite sport?
You: hockey
Stranger: i grow up in guangdong
Stranger: i like table tennis
Stranger: i was burn in guangxi
You: tennis is good sport
Stranger: do you know my means?
Stranger: but i am a new guy
You: 你好
You: I new too
Stranger: i don't want to speak chinese
You: ok
You: You want to English?
Stranger: if you want to speak chinese
You: no.no, i english to you
Stranger: just simply talk
Stranger: ok
You: how weather now?
Stranger: because my English is poor
Stranger: cloudy
You: Engrish good for me
You: sunny
Stranger: thanks
Stranger: you are not bad
You: outside 10 up temperature
You: i no
Stranger: here outside 19
You: u like ice cream?
Stranger: you are a student or a worker?
Stranger: no
You: I is student
You: U study in what subject?
Stranger: i just like white hot water
Stranger: 工程管理
Stranger: i'm a boy
Stranger: and you
Stranger: which university
You: How is water white? Me girls like
Stranger: sorry
Stranger: i mean hot water
You: Henan University
Stranger: do you know my mean
Stranger: it is a good university
You: u mean good
Stranger: 我在苏州科技大学
Stranger: no,no
You: ok
Stranger: i'm grade two
Stranger: and you
Stranger: may i have your name?
You: university four year
Stranger: my name is Wang guibin
You: my name is Xuo Fuichi
Stranger: oh,my study eld sistrer
You: I like sister older
Stranger: ????
You: My sister is older. I like sister
Stranger: i don't understand your mean
Stranger: do you mind tell me your age?
You: 30
You: sister 31
Stranger: oh
You: sister good
Stranger: i was burn in1986
Stranger: but i like a brother
You: have you brother?
Stranger: why you don't tell me your study subje?ct
Stranger: no
Stranger: i have three sisters
You: how 3 sisters?
Stranger: i'm the second children at my family.
Stranger: one elder sisiter,tow sister
You: i from farm, 2 child only
Stranger: may i have your QQ numbers?
Stranger: en
You: how qq?
Stranger: maybe i know
You: know what?
Stranger: your family just 4 peole
Stranger: people
Stranger: i from counryside
You: yes
Stranger: family is poor
You: work hard, but poor
Stranger: you said it
Stranger: you don't know QQ?
You: no
Stranger: i don't believe you!
Stranger: have past the Englsh grade four test?
You: why
Stranger: Every chinese all know use it
Stranger: just you say haven't the QQ number
You: i am chinese
Stranger: you not??
You: what is not?
Stranger: not is a chinese
You: Honestly, I am Chinese.
Stranger: i feel my English so bad
Stranger: oh
You: It's not that bad
You: You are learning
Stranger: why you didn't have a number
Stranger: about it
You: I do not use it
Stranger: understood
Stranger: thank you your words
Stranger: do you have got marry?
You: No, I am single
You: And you?
Stranger: why
Stranger: you like single?
Stranger: i'm not
You: I have not found right female
Stranger: en
You: I am looking
Stranger: i want to find one
You: It is hard to find someone you like
Stranger: i'm not only short,but also ugly.
You: The one must respect me.
You: How can you say you are ugly?
Stranger: just that you love the one,he don' love you
Stranger: just i think
You: he is male. You like males? Not that there's anything wrong with that.
You: You have beauty inside
You: We all do
Stranger: no
Stranger: u don't have my words
Stranger: how do you know me
Stranger: no
You: I don't know you.
Stranger: all people could use he take it place
You: now this i do not understand
Stranger: why you say that i have beauty inside??
Stranger: 可以用他来指代任何人，明白了吧
Stranger: my mobil phone is 150501****3,you could call me. i want to make a friend to you.do you agree?
You: Well, I don't know. You seem like a nice guy
Stranger: no
You: Lonely, but a nice guy
Stranger: i'm just plain guy.
Stranger: hah
Stranger: maybe
Stranger: a waiting love guy
Stranger: aha
You: Tell you what. And this time I am being honest. Keep talking to people here and you're find other people that you are looking for. I don't think I'm the right guy for you. I'm from Canada, and I am Chinese
Stranger: i don't want to say goodbye.but i have to leave.i great to meet you.
You: A bientot!
Stranger: i know you are honest
You: Parlez vous une autre langue?
Stranger: hope you call mae
You: may whatever winds take us to whichever paths we are destined to follow. I have no idea what that really mans
You: er, means
Stranger: me ,too
Stranger: maybe it is friendship
You: Peut-etre
Stranger: or you could send me e-mail.my a-mail is 25834****@qq.com
Stranger: you are who talk with me so long time people
Stranger: thanks
You: Je peux faire ca. Je sais. Je suis vraiment inquete
Stranger: do you want to have lunch?
Stranger: i could not understang your mean
You: Quoi? Comment on fait ca?
Stranger: i'm a wooden guy
You: How can I possibly have lunch with you?
Stranger: come here with me have lunch,it is my treat.
Stranger: aha
Stranger: yes
Stranger: just come to my sckool
You: I’ll just email you, goddammit
You have disconnected.

NOTE: I have obscured the Stranger's info for anonymity's sake. Sorry to any Xuo Fuichi's out there.